Bottlefeeding Is Not Wrong

Reading this story from The Guardian today has left me fuming. Saying that “Baby formula has no place in a sustainable future” is like slapping all bottle-feeding moms in the face.

First of all, yes, I 100% agree that breastfeeding a baby is healthier for both baby and mama. BUT, it’s not always possible. In fact, a lot of times moms just aren’t able to do it – for a variety of reasons. That top reason? CHOICE. It’s horrible when a news outlet basically says those who don’t breastfeed are shitty moms. Yes, they have freedom of the press and free speech, however it’s very unclassy to single out a group of mothers who aren’t able to or don’t wish to breastfeed. If there’s going to be a story about breastfeeding versus bottle-feeding, at least make sure all the facts regarding BOTH sides are included in the article and don’t single out a group of women negatively.

I agree, the United States has seen an upturn in breastfeeding in recent years and I would have loved to continue to breastfeed my son. Unfortunately, after 3 weeks of attempting to sustain supply, it just wasn’t in the cards for me. I tried it all – Fenugreek, massage, relaxation techniques. Nothing. Nada. Therefore, we had to bottle-feed with formula. Even while in the hospital I was never instructed on HOW to bottle-feed. Everything was BREASTFEED, BREASTFEED, BREASTFEED. Not once did anyone in our baby classes mention anything regarding formula or bottle-feeding. It was all pro-breastfeeding. I had planned on breastfeeding from the get-go, but what if I hadn’t? Would I have been judged? Criticized? The answer is yes. Especially at a hospital that advocates breastfeeding-only practices.

Another problem I have? The Guardian making statements that ARE NOT TRUE. Including this one:

the free formula sample bag given in many hospitals includes an ice-pack to help stop milk flow in new mothers.

The ice pack is for use in a cooler to keep breast milk or formula cold while away from home. There are molded ice packs out there for mothers who choose to stop breastfeeding to soothe painful and engorged breasts. But, the packs included in formula company freebies are not marketed for use on breasts.

This statement also makes absolutely ZERO sense in regards to formula:

a sustainable future will require certain industries – not just tobacco and fossil fuels, air travel and automobiles, even baby formula – to become much much smaller to sustain a population of nine billion human beings.

Why will the BABY FORMULA industry need to become smaller to sustain a population of 9 billion? I understand the others – tobacco and fossil fuels, air travel, and automobiles – but what does baby formula have to do with sustaining the environment?

I by no means consider myself a “green mom,” however I recycle and do what I can to help the environment. I understand formula-feeding does promote the use of plastic baby bottles, rubber nipples, and the materials (generally cardboard and plastic) used to distribute the formula to stores. But, once again, shrinking the industry may hinder the access some moms need to feed their child.

Questions to be answered in response to this article:

• What do moms who adopt do? They aren’t able to breastfeed.
• What about moms who can’t sustain an adequate supply for their child?
• Breastfeeding moms who return to work pump a supply to be fed to their child by a caregiver IN A BOTTLE. How is THIS helping the environment? Bottles are still purchased and used.
• What about moms who have an ailment or disease and can’t breastfeed because of it?
• What about mothers who aren’t okay with feeding their baby “donation breast milk?”

Just some things to think about when promoting a breastfed-only world. It isn’t possible – AND THAT’S OK. Freedom of speech is one thing, but freedom of choice is also important and moms should not be criticized for formula-feeding their baby.

Oh, and one more thing. This article was WRITTEN BY A MAN.

I was reading the comments on this article and I really enjoyed this one by user EDavMA:

I strongly believe that the mother’s mental health is more important to a baby than her breast milk. Even without reading the author’s name, I would’ve known instantly that this had been written by a man. I agree that everything should be done to help encourage and facilitate breastfeeding but not if it risks the mother’s mental well-being. Breastfeeding is hard – as much as it sounds natural on paper, some babies won’t take to it, it hurts like you wouldn’t believe (something the author of this article will never experience) – from bleeding and peeling nipples to engorged breasts and blisters, some mothers’ bodies just aren’t physically equipped properly and others will find it mentally difficult. After a tough 2 weeks of the above mentioned side effects, I could physically breastfeed very well, but I was finding it mentally very hard. I managed 3 months and then started moving to formula. Now my baby is on formula exclusively and I’m in a much better place mentally and stress wise. I’m not stupid, I understand the benefits of breastfeeding but I just couldn’t sustain it. This article should be re-written by a woman, a mother, who has experienced the difficulties of breastfeeding.

I, too, struggled not only physically to breastfeed, but mentally. This article should have been written by a woman who has experienced the ups and downs of breastfeeding. Men have no idea what women go through, therefore have NO OPINION on the subject.

Do what feels right FOR YOU! Don’t let ANYONE make you feel like less of a mom because you choose not to or can’t breastfeed. You know what’s right for you and your baby. -themidwestmama

After Birth: Taking Care of Mama

After giving birth, everything is about the baby. But, you need special care too! While in the hospital, you’re taken care of, provided necessary supplies and instructed on what to do. Then you’re sent home, likely after just two days, and then what?

First, before baby arrives be sure you’re stocked up on the “new mom essentials” necessary to get you through the first few weeks at home. Taking care of yourself is just as vital as taking care of baby, especially if you’ll be breastfeeding.

In my experience, you may need:

Maxi Pads

These are absolutely essential. You will need them. At the beginning,  I used Always Maxi Overnight Pads without Wings and they worked well for me. I bled for 6-7 weeks after birth, but each time it tapered off I’d switch to a lighter pad. I went from the bulky overnight pads, down to regular pads, then light pads, and ended with just a panty liner. I recommend purchasing at least 2 packages of the overnight pads and one of each of the others.

Cheap Underwear

Unless you want to ruin your good underwear, I recommend buying at least one package of cheap underwear. I purchased a 10-pack of Fruit of the Loom Cotton Briefs and they came in handy! There will be accidents while bleeding and having cheap underwear on hand saves your good underwear from stains! After you’ve stopped bleeding, you can just toss the ruined pairs in the trash.

Tucks Medicated Cooling Pads

Although these are technically for hemorrhoids, I was given them in the hospital to soothe and cool my nether regions. I was able to take the remaining pads home, but I ended up needing more so I’m glad I had purchased a tub of them prior to giving birth.

Peri-bottle

The hospital provides one to you for the duration of your stay, and you will be able to take it with you upon discharge so you probably don’t necessarily have to purchase one of these. But, be sure to take it home with you because you will need it the first week or two! They are an amazing little invention and I am seriously considering putting in a Bidet because of them!

Padsicles

These are wonderful little DIY inventions that are highly recommended by me and many other “mommy blogs.” I made 20-25 of these babies beforehand just in case I needed pain relief and soothing comfort when I got home from the hospital. Luckily, I didn’t need to use them but I am glad I had them just in case.

Stool Softener

The nurses will give you this twice daily while in the hospital, but I suggest purchasing a bottle for home use. Luckily, due to these awesome little pills, I was able to “go” the day after coming home! I’m partial to the Walgreens brand myself. I have heard horror stories of mommies who weren’t able to go for weeks and it made me wonder if they weren’t taking their softeners. They DO help!

Freezer Meals

A must if you don’t have a ton of family and friends nearby. My husband and I don’t have any family within 100’s of miles of us and most of our friends were preoccupied with other things, so we were happy to have a freezer full of pre-made food to consume! Trust me, you will not feel like making an elaborate meal and it’s a must to eat healthy after having a baby, especially if you’re breastfeeding. Make some casseroles, slow cooker soups & stews, and other freezable goodies to have for the first 2 weeks. You’ll be glad you did.

Dermoplast

Dermoplast is a lovely numbing spray that really helps with aches and pains in the vaginal area after giving birth, especially if you’ve torn or had an episiotomy. They will provide this in the hospital, but may not give you a can to take home. I hadn’t heard about this prior to birth, so I didn’t have any to take home. I asked if I could have a new can to take home and they gave me one (but the nurse said it isn’t typical to supply a 2nd can). Pick some up just in case!

Preparation H

This will come in handy if you develop hemorrhoids during delivery or after. They do supply a tube in most hospitals.

Pain Reliever

If you’ve had a C-Section, you will be provided with a prescription for heavier pain meds, but if you delivered vaginally they generally won’t supply prescription pain relievers after you’re discharged. Pick up some ibuprofen or acetaminophen to have on hand.

Snacks

Trust me, after going through the energy-zapping experience of giving birth, you will want to devour everything in sight. I ate so much after having Owen, it was insane. After coming home, I was glad to have snacks on hand for the middle of the night and anytime I breastfed in those early weeks. I recommend Nutri-Grain Bars, Pop-Tarts, Nature Valley Crunchy Peanut Butter Bars, Powerade, and water. I know these aren’t the most nutritious snacks, but if you’re breastfeeding you will need the extra caloric intake.

Heating Pad

This helped during pregnancy, but also helped postpartum for pains in my back, lower back & hips, and the pelvic region.

Robe

This isn’t always necessary, but I’m glad my mother-in-law bought me one. Prior to her arriving (and prior to having the robe!) I would come downstairs and clean my pump parts and/or prepare formula in my underwear and a t-shirt. Not something everyone wants to see. After my MIL came, I was happy to have something to cover up with in the middle of the night.

Toilet Paper

Although you won’t be using toilet paper for the first week or two, your husband will appreciate having a stockpile so he doesn’t have to run out in the middle of the night because you ran out. Toilet paper is not something you want to run out of. Trust me.

A Good Water Bottle

This is especially important if you are breastfeeding because you have to drink A LOT of water to keep up your milk supply. Of course, it’s also healthy to stay well-hydrated after birth even if you’re not breastfeeding. I remember waking in the night and chugging an entire pitcher of water – every single night! I was so thirsty all the time! Plus, having a good water bottle on hand makes it easy to take with you – anywhere!

Chapstick

For some reason your lips will become super dry and chapped after delivering a baby. I don’t know if it’s because you’ve just spent two or more days in the hospital (they’re always so dry!), or because you’ve just been through a life-altering event, but you will need your favorite chapstick to keep lips soft, supple and hydrated.

Are there products not on this list that you used or needed after giving birth? Please share them in the comments! I’d love to hear from you. Have a Super Day! -themidwestmama

Top Ten Tuesday: DIY Keepsakes

I am a very sentimental person. I love to make and purchase keepsakes to document every moment of my son’s life. I found most of the DIY Keepsake ideas below on Pinterest and I can’t wait to make them myself! If you’re a crafty person, or even if you’re not, these DIY ideas to showcase baby are super simple and FUN!

1. Week or Month in Review Binder – This would be cool to document baby’s firsts and milestones each month!
2. Monthly Photos – Document baby’s monthly changes and growth
3. Newborn Shadowbox – Showcase baby’s first pictures, going home outfit, hospital bracelets and more
4. Mommy and Me Handprint Art – Can do this with baby and anyone! Mom, Dad, Papa, Grandma, etc.
5. Safety Pin Wall Art – Cutest thing ever.
6. Onesie Quilt or Memory Quilt – What a great keepsake to make for you or your baby!
7. Baby Yearbook – Make a photo book for each year!
8. Wall Art from Baby Shower Cards – Instead of just storing those cards from your shower, cut out a heart shape from each and make wall art for baby’s nursery or even your living room!
9. Baby Keepsake Box – Create a keepsake box of baby items – first onesie, baby shoes, baby cards received the first year, birth certificate in neat holder, etc.
10. Baby’s First Christmas Ornament with Hand or Footprint – You can do this yearly! A special set of keepsakes for your son or daughter’s tree in the future!

I have many, many more ideas for DIY keepsakes I’ve found online or done on my own. There will be a separate post on this coming in the future. Happy Day! -themidwestmama

Moms Have Needs Too!

You’ve just had a baby and now you’ll spend every waking moment tending to his or her needs. The endless diaper changes and feedings become second nature. You spend ALL your time tending to your new little bundle, but DON’T forget to take care of yourself, Mama! After becoming a new mother in November 2013 I learned very quickly that my needs were important too and I needed to take care of myself.

What I learned within the first MONTH of becoming a mother…

Take at least 30 minutes EVERY DAY for yourself. Meditate, close your eyes and daydream, take a hot shower or soothing bath, read a book (preferably something NOT related to baby), watch television, exercise – the list is endless. DON’T do housework during this “30 minute mom time.” Do something for yourself that doesn’t involve husbands/partners and baby.

During the first 2-3 weeks sleep WHENEVER you can. Honestly, you’ve probably heard it a million times – “When baby sleeps, mama sleeps.” As much as I didn’t want everyone to be right, they were. Get ALL the sleep you can those first few weeks, SERIOUSLY GET ALL THE SLEEP YOU CAN! Even if it’s only a half hour when baby takes a cat nap. Every second of sleep counts, trust me! The first 3 weeks after we came home from the hospital, I was a walking zombie because I didn’t take everyone’s advice. When Owen slept, I attempted to do housework or play games on my cell phone. Big mistake. You’ll get burned out really fast if you don’t get sleep. If hubby (or partner or family member) offer to watch the baby while you take a nap – LET THEM. Sleep is important, especially when you need to fully function so you can take care of baby.

Have that glass of wine or beer – because you CAN! My OB told me that having one small glass of wine per day after pregnancy, EVEN IF BREASTFEEDING, is absolutely fine. If you’re like me and missed having wine during those long 9 months of pregnancy, a glass will be in order when you get home. Do it for YOU.

Start playdates early. Even though the kids won’t be old enough to play or interact, YOU will need the interaction with other ADULTS. I learned this after a few weeks. I realized I had been talking to my husband (about the baby) and to my son and nobody else  (in person). Luckily, our friends had a baby 10 days before we did so we called them up and scheduled a get together immediately. It was GREAT being around other adults and having a conversation about something other than baby (although that was a good chunk). Regardless, just seeing and being around other adults was a lifesaver.

Be sure to eat. Between trying to take care of Owen, feeding him and somehow keep the house semi-clean, I found there wasn’t a lot of time for me to eat. Therefore, I rarely ate those first few weeks. THIS IS NOT GOOD. You should be eating healthy and frequently. When feeding baby, whether via breast or bottle, have a snack. When baby goes down for a nap, have a quick snack and then nap yourself. Be sure to have a hearty meal at least once per day! Not only will food nourish your body, it will keep your energy up – and boy, do you need that energy!

Get out of the house at least once a week. If you have a spring, summer or early autumn baby, getting out of the house isn’t an issue since you can take baby out in the stroller for walks. But, if you’re like me and you had a winter baby, it’s hard to get out WITH baby because it’s too frigid outside. If you can’t take baby for an outing (we were advised to wait 8 weeks due to flu season), have someone (husband, partner, parent) watch the kiddo while you get a manicure, go shopping, run errands, exercise, etc. Getting out BY YOURSELF will keep you sane. I promise you will need this.

Continue your morning routine. Yes, you had a baby and will generally have less time to do everything nowadays, but TRY to stick to the morning routine you had prior to baby, and even prior to pregnancy. Get dressed daily. You will feel 100% better if you get up and get dressed instead of lounging around in your jammies. Of course, there’ll be one or two days where you might not even have time to change and that’s okay! But attempt to get dressed every day. If putting on makeup was a normal morning ritual, continue to do this too! YOU WILL FEEL BETTER!

These things all worked WELL for me. I hope they work well for you too! Everyone’s different though, so if there’s something on this list that doesn’t suit you – find what DOES suit you and DO IT! Yes, baby is your #1 now, but Mom is important too. More to come as I experience getting through the 1st year of my son’s life with my sanity intact. -themidwestmama